While cargo shorts are certainly not “high fashion”, they allow new dads to hold baby related items in the side pockets when your hands are full. While it’s essential to have a fully stocked diaper bag, sometimes it’s faster to hold a small burp cloth or tissues in your side pocket to deal with spills or runny noses. Just make sure to empty your pockets before you throw the shorts in the wash.
Babies are instantly attracted to the brightly colored, noise making devices that we always seem to be reaching for. When the baby gets a hold of your phone, they can be locked in and often fuss if you take it away. However, if you go to accessibility settings for color filters on an iPhone, you can make the phone a grayscale color that is far less appealing to baby. Accessibility shortcut also allows you to toggle colors on and off by tapping on the home screen three times. If you use android, go to Developer options and select “Simulate color space” to enable “Monochromacy”. Grayscale also saves battery life and when you’re not around baby, feel free to switch it back to normal
If you find yourself saying “I’m just picking up something off the floor,” or “It’s OK, he doesn’t know how to roll,” or “I have her strapped in the car seat, I’ll just put her over here while I wash my hands”, please keep in mind that babies are constantly learning and making new movements. If you need to put the baby down, make sure it’s safely in a crib, pack & play, or on a low, steady and flat surface.
A half-finished job isn’t helpful. Don’t pull out five loads of laundry if you only have time to complete one load from crumpled to closet. Don’t start making food if you leave out all of the plates and have unwashed pans on the counter.
With your attention moving in so many directions, it’s easy to get distracted, but remember this phrase: There is no later. Starting multiple tasks and leaving them unfinished makes you feel increased anxiety and leads to resentment with your partner. Consider completing several small tasks and then waiting until you have a block of time to get other stuff done. Don’t wait for the “later” that will never come. Do it now!
This past year I had the opportunity to be a stay at home dad with
my daughter. When I began, I had no clue what I was doing and found it
challenging to find clear and concise tips about how to navigate the sudden
change in our relationship. When a new baby enters your home, it saps nearly
100% of your wife’s attention. Even if you are doing everything you can to
help, the sleep deprivation, stress and new family dynamics can often lead to
arguments—and a lack of passion. For many new couples, romance can fade for
reasons such as:
like there’s a never ending “to-do” list.
You respect everything this amazing woman has done to bring your
child into this world, but there’s just not much you can do about the physical
pain. However, when it comes to exhaustion, poor communication and that to-do
list”, there are a number of steps you can take to change the game and look
like a stud in the process
1. Use a
baby carrier in the house to accomplish tasks: As a new
dad, I found that there are few things more satisfying than the look on your
wife’s face when she sees that you’re inside the house, taking care of chores
with the baby in a carrier, strapped to your chest. The baby is bonding with
you, while listening to your heartbeat and feeling calm, as though the little
tyke is back in the womb. This is your moment! Your wife sees you accomplishing
tasks—and caring for the baby. She might begin to search for other things that
need to be done around the house. Just tell her “I got it.” Then maybe she will
spin around to make sure that everything is okay, and that’s when you say
“Babe,” pause and stare into her eyes, wait a few seconds and say the following
words in your most legit voice: “Babe…take
some time to yourself. If anything comes up… I’ll get you.”
2. Never run an errand without a list: When you walk into the baby aisle, make sure
that you are equipped with a list of specific items that are pre-screened by
your partner. You might think that all “size 1” diapers are the same, but your
partner is likely focused on leak guards, wetness indicator strips and a
preferred brand. Before you walk out the door, check the items on your list and
ask the magic question: “Honey, should I look for a specific brand?”
3. Surprise your wife with an occasional spa
day: After a few
months of total infant care, encourage your wife to leave the house without the
baby. Gift her with a mani/pedicure, massage or another spa treatment. Pick a
random Saturday and call it “Daddy and Baby Day.” Tell her in advance that it’s
just you and the baby for a few hours. She can choose to go to the spa, have
lunch with friends, or just sit in a coffee shop and have time to herself. Find
a day that works, and schedule it.
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